Last Saturday, my backyard in Austin looked like a glitter bomb exploded inside a Disney vault. My niece, Maya, was turning four, and since I’m the designated “fun aunt” and a total sucker for a theme, I volunteered to host. The humidity was hovering at a solid eighty percent while I frantically pinned pink streamers…
My backyard looked like a unicorn exploded in a hardware store last Tuesday, and honestly, I am still finding traces of “Sunset Orange” on the dog. If you have ever stood in the middle of a suburban Portland lawn with fifteen screaming seven-year-olds holding dripping paintbrushes, you know the specific brand of terror I am…
March 14 was a total blur of neon green icing and the scent of cedar mulch in my Austin backyard. My son Leo turned three, and if you know anything about three-year-olds in Central Texas, you know they have a biological imperative to scream “Rawr” at every passing squirrel. I spent three weeks obsessing over…
My kitchen smelled like burnt sugar and desperation on the morning of March 12, 2024. I stood over a lopsided strawberry cake, clutching a plastic spatula like a weapon while my twins, Leila and Sam, argued about who got to wear the “sparkly” whiskers. We were four hours away from sixteen nine-year-olds descending upon our…
My kitchen looked like a tiger exploded in it by 2 AM on June 11th. There was orange felt lint in my beard, a literal string of hot glue fused to my thumbnail, and my sink was stained with a questionable shade of “Tigey” orange dye. Being a single dad in Atlanta means you often…
The Portland rain was absolutely hammering against my kitchen window on April 14th last year, and my living room looked like a neon butterfly had exploded in a tissue paper factory. Sophia was turning 12, and she had decided—with all the intensity of a middle schooler—that she was too old for “baby parties” but still…
Twenty seven-year-olds in a small Houston backyard is basically a polite riot waiting to happen. I have spent fifteen years teaching second grade, so I know the look in a child’s eye when they are about to lose their minds over a cupcake. Last March 12, 2024, I hosted a celebration for my niece, Lily,…
I stood in my Atlanta driveway holding a crumpled Little Caesars receipt for exactly $58.14. Inside my house, a swarm of pre-teens was screaming at my living room television. I had just successfully pulled off a budget mario party for 11 year old birthday boy Leo. I spent $58 total for 19 kids, age 12…
My living room still looks like a neon unicorn exploded in it, and honestly, Sophie’s sixth birthday was three weeks ago. If you are hunting for trolls party ideas for girls, you have to accept one universal truth: glitter is now your permanent roommate. It is in the rug. It is in the dog’s fur….
My kitchen counter is currently a disaster zone of glitter, twine, and tiny plastic cows because I am neck-deep in planning my middle child Maya’s 7th birthday bash. If you are a mom in suburban Portland like me, you know the pressure of a Sauvie Island-style farm theme. Finding the best invitation for farm party…
