My rescue terrier mix, Barnaby, was wearing a tiny black-and-white referee shirt while aggressively humping a giant inflatable Spalding. That was the exact moment I realized my sister’s backyard in South Austin had descended into total, irreversible chaos. We were throwing a budget basketball party for 2 year old Leo, my absolute favorite nephew, and…
Portland rain was aggressively pelting the kitchen window on March 12th. I was staring at a pile of crumpled pink tissue paper, a dangerously hot glue gun, and exactly ten blank white paper sacks. Pulling off my youngest daughter Chloe’s 4th birthday meant I desperately needed to assemble the perfect gabby dollhouse birthday goodie bags…
I spent three weeks hyper-fixating on tiny plastic cows and galvanized tin buckets. My nephew Leo was turning three on October 14th, 2023. Since my golden retriever Buster shares the exact same birth week, we threw a massive joint backyard bash right here in Austin. The Texas heat was still lingering around 85 degrees. The…
Glitter is the enemy of the Houston humidity. I learned this the hard way on October 14, 2024, standing in a sweltering backyard with eleven sugar-fueled three-year-olds. I am Ms. Karen. I teach second grade, but I get roped into throwing at least six classroom and family parties a year because I own a heavy-duty…
I am currently on my hands and knees, aggressively scraping dried, neon-green buttercream frosting off my dining room floorboards. It is Tuesday afternoon. The party was three days ago on Saturday, May 14th. My youngest son, Leo, just turned four. But since he desperately misses his old preschool friends from last year, we decided to…
Portland rain is relentless in March. My basement always smells slightly of damp cardboard and old laundry during the spring. But on Friday, March 15th, 2024, I turned that dark suburban dungeon into a makeshift Jurassic research facility for fifteen extremely loud eleven-year-old boys. Finding the exact right dinosaur candles for kids was strangely the…
I stared at my bank account on May 1st, 2023, and audibly sighed. Maya and Leo were turning six in exactly twelve days. They demanded a magical garden theme. We live in a third-floor walk-up in Logan Square with a concrete balcony that barely fits two rusted lawn chairs. If you are sitting there Googling…
Teaching third grade in Houston means I throw at least six major classroom parties a year. You learn fast. I stood staring at aisle four of Party City on I-10 on October 12th, holding a stack of flimsy pink cardboard under the humming fluorescent lights. I needed peppa pig plates for my reading group’s end-of-term…
Snow was piling up against the windows of our drafty Chicago bungalow on February 12, 2026, and I had exactly three hours to turn my living room into a nightclub for twelve rowdy seven-year-olds. My twins, Leo and Maya, were vibrating with that frantic birthday energy that only kids possess. I stood there with a…
Lucy’s fourth birthday party was officially three weeks away and my living room looked like a blush-colored glitter bomb had detonated in the middle of a craft store. My seven-year-old, Leo, was currently trying to see how many pink marshmallows he could fit in his mouth at once, and my oldest, Maya, who is eleven…
