Leo’s third birthday on April 12, 2025, started with a literal bang when a balloon popped near his ear, but the real chaos began when ten toddlers descended on my Denver backyard to find hidden plastic dinosaurs. I had spent three weeks obsessing over finding the best scavenger hunt party supplies because my wife, Jen,…
I stared at the kitchen island on March 12, 2024, feeling like a failure as a father because I couldn’t find a single disco party party favors set that didn’t look like a potential choking hazard or a toxic waste spill. My daughter Chloe was turning six in forty-eight hours. She wanted “glitter, dancing, and…
My son Leo turned five on July 12, 2024, and the heat in Atlanta was thick enough to chew. We had twelve kids vibrating with sugar in my backyard, and I realized too late that I had forgotten the most basic element of a chaotic carnival: the noise. I stood there, a single dad holding…
My living room smelled like grape juice and wet dog on April 12, 2025. It was Leo’s fourth birthday, and I had somehow convinced myself that a “Butterfly Garden” theme was a great idea for a dozen chaotic toddlers in the middle of a Portland spring. The rain was drumming against the windows in that…
Twenty five-year-olds hyped on yellow food dye and buttercream frosting is a force of nature. I teach kindergarten in Houston, Texas. I throw at least six major classroom parties a year. You learn survival skills fast in this job. Last October 12, I hosted Leo’s fifth birthday in my room during the last hour of…
My kitchen floor was a literal sea of red, blue, and gold crepe paper by 7:30 AM last Saturday, April 12, 2025. Sam, my youngest who just hit the big five, was already vibrating with enough energy to power the entire city of Portland. He wanted the “super-duper hero party,” and as a mom of…
I was standing in my kitchen on April 12th, 2024, covered in green buttercream and wondering why on earth I thought I could sculpt a realistic cow out of marzipan while my four-year-old, Leo, was busy trying to shove a handful of sprinkles up his nose. This was the kickoff for his third birthday party,…
The Austin sun was hitting the backyard of our East Side bungalow just right on March 14th when I realized I had severely underestimated the physical footprint of twenty-one pre-teens high on sugar and Bluey-induced nostalgia. My niece, Maya, was turning eleven, and she had insisted on a “Bluey but make it ironic” theme. It…
My daughter Chloe turned two on March 12, 2023, and I learned a painful lesson about gravity. I thought a pink bedsheet and some cheap Scotch tape would make a decent princess backdrop in our Atlanta living room. It didn’t. Ten minutes before the first guest arrived, the whole thing slid down the wall like…
